I am attempting to do what C.S. Lewis did in "The Screwtape Letters", only I am going in the reverse, characterizing angels, not demons.
What a delighted to hear from you! We return our warmest greetings. We are overjoyed to see that you are doing well and have been staying in communication. Thank you for your reply.
It is to our understanding that you are discouraged with the responsibility you feel in ministering to others. You are afraid to pour time and energy into loving people because you seriously doubt your capability and their receptiveness. You remember in the past you have failed to witness any growth from the seeds you tried to plant, and as a result you are disheartened to venture out again.
Dearly beloved! Do not forget your purpose. Your purpose is not to find success--in anything. We will remind you again, you are not measured on the level of hearts you save, you cannot save anyone. No. Also, never forget that what you might consider defeat or victory your Father may see as something completely different.
What matters is that you remain faithful. Remain faithful in your relationships. Refuse to base your gratification on the change you see in others. It is not your responsibility to change them, only to remain faithful to what you are able to do today.
It is not right to take on the responsibility of another's salvation. If you believe it is your duty to convert the nations, then you will likewise believe it is to your credit they are converted. It is not. The credit belongs to God and God alone.
This does not mean you forget about the call of discipleship. By no means! You are indeed commanded to seek after the Kingdom. Yet, we warn you, be careful to what standard you would hold yourself. Do not discredit the situation you are in today as an opportunity. Do not wish you were somewhere else. The reality is you are not somewhere else, and you are called to be faithful in all circumstances. So love unconditionally, minister with no expectation. Remember it is not your responsibility to make the seed grow, only to plant it. It is not your responsibility to make the sheep come, only to feed them. It is not your responsibility to change the world, only to remain faithful in it.
Be encouraged. Pride would have you believe your ministry aught to look just so, with these specific components, or else you are not pleasing God, and what you are doing is not truly ministry. Everything you do is ministry, beloved. Everything. If your heart truly drives you to reach the thousands, then by all means, reach them. But you will not, indeed, you cannot, until you are faithful in the small, thankless ministry he has called you to right now, in this place, at this hour.
We will not neglect to reply again soon.
God be with you always,